SADNESS AND LONELINESS STAY WITH ME AT THE END OF MY TIME

sunday morning.. it supposed to be the beautiful day..

i'd just came back from the long greatest trip and i was planned to relaxing myself, after a week full of shit..

but, suddenly.. everything was change!

it become the worst sunday of my life.

something happened that push me to make a biggest decision for once in my life..

i know it was sound to fast or may be, i haven't thinking it twice before i've that decision. but one thing that i realize, is i gotta do something for my own life.

i walked away, so far away..

i don't even know what was gonna happen to me in the next term of my life.. but i know, i gotta go.. eventho, i never realize how it could be when i was trying to struggle by my own hands..

but i know, i can and i have to..

in the past few months, i realize that living alone was never easy.

i have to working so hard to earn something for my life.

sometimes, i felt i cant do this.. but, if i surrender on it, i know, i wont never ever be grown up..

i try to face it! i try to living alone, 

feeling how hard it would be. 

every night, i was crying on my bed.. feeling guilty, tired, and sometimes i wanna give up.. but then, when i wake up. 

i know, it was just a lil trouble in my life 

that i have to faced it.

there's gonna be so much trouble in the next term of my life.

but know, i'm tired. 

i'm tired of being alone.

i've tried to reach my happiness, but i know..

this is not the time yet!

i have to faced it.

all i got is the sadness and loneliness..

i must admit that i have often thought of leaving it all behind and letting everything go. i was lost and lone, as i always am.

so many people around me, but yet no one seems to care!

they say they understand and love me very much. but just when i trust to love, they forgot and move on, and leave me alone..

 but that's okay!

heyy, it was the life that i have to face it. i knew there was a reason for me being alone. so many bad things happening at once.

they can make you forget about the good qualities of life.

now, the only thing i know now is,

sadness will find me at the end of my life and loneliness will stay with me until the end of time..